Talk Like a Pirate Day

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Yarr! Greeting me hearties! Today Be Talk like a Pirate Day!

http://www.talklikeapirate.com/

 

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Ooo arr who put sand in the va...

 

Being a professional pirate and scourge of the River Thames, I felt I should add to the pirate dictionary there (and these are real terms by the way, hence why they are mostly not very nice, as pirates generally were bad eggs)

Callet - a whore
Noddy - a fool
Corsair - a privateer
Gleet - an STI, generally thought to be gohnorrhea
Boatswain (Bo'sun) - the person in charge of the cables, rigging and anchor
Keelhaul - A form of punishment, where sailors were dragged under the keel of the ship by yardarms
Boxing ones Jesuit - Having a bit of 'quiet time', if you get my drift
Chain shot - a form of cannon shot with two cannon balls linked by a chain, ideal for busting up sails
Grape shot - Makes the cannon like a giat shotgun, fires all sorts of debris (nuts, bolts, shrapnel) and intended to be fired at crews on the deck of enemy ships
forecastle The forward part of a ship below the deck, where the crew quarters were usually located. Also called: fo’c’s’le.

Anyone who has read the excellent Requiem Shark by Nicholas Griffin or played the brilliant Sid Meier's Pirates will have come across these

Cap'n Cockles

 

Well shiver me timbers, you learn something new everyday on CF

 

Pirate walks uncomfortably into a bar with a ships steering wheel sticking out of the front of his pants.

Bartender says, "Oh, man! That's GOT to be uncomfortable!"

Pirate says, "Aaaarrrrr... aye, matey!"

Bartender asks, "So... why do you have a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?"

Pirate says, "Aaarrrrrrrr... it be drivin' me nuts!"

 

Boom and indeed boom, BM

 

An oldie but a baddie.