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sods law

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by moominboy, Sep 30, 2005.

  1. moominboy

    moominboy Gigabyte Poster

    I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've
    been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.

    These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
    had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came
    home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your
    favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.

    You came home and ate in
    two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game.

    You don't
    tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're
    cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

    P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
    away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
    Your EX-Wife

    Dear ExWife

    Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
    It's true that you
    and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry
    from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your
    constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work.

    I did notice when you cut off
    all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look
    just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say
    anything nice.

    When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
    confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I
    went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag
    was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had
    just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was
    $49.99.

    After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it
    out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dllars,
    I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you
    were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the
    filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you
    wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

    P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born
    Carla. I hope that's not a problem.I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've
    been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
    These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
    had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came
    home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your
    favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in
    two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't
    tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're
    cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

    P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
    away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
    Your EX-Wife

    Dear ExWife

    Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you
    and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry
    from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your
    constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off
    all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look
    just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say
    anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
    confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I
    went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag
    was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had
    just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was
    $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it
    out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dllars,
    I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you
    were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the
    filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you
    wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

    P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born
    Carla. I hope that's not a problem.I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've
    been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it.
    These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
    had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came
    home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your
    favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in
    two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't
    tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any thing. Either you're
    cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.

    P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
    away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
    Your EX-Wife

    Dear ExWife

    Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you
    and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry
    from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your
    constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off
    all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look
    just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say
    anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
    confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I
    went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag
    was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had
    just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was
    $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it
    out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dllars,
    I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you
    were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the
    filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you
    wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

    P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born
    Carla. I hope that's not a problem.
     
    Certifications: ECDL
    WIP: A+
  2. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

    7,796
    71
    224
    Hmmm, did this happen to you 3 times moomin?:hhhmmm
     
    Certifications: A+ | Network+ | Security+ | MCP (270,271,272,290,620) | MCDST | MCTS:Vista
    WIP: MCSA, 70-622,680,685
  3. Boycie
    Honorary Member

    Boycie Senior Beer Tester

    6,281
    85
    174
    LOL :D
     
    Certifications: MCSA 2003, MCDST, A+, N+, CTT+, MCT
  4. moominboy

    moominboy Gigabyte Poster


    dont know what happened there nugget?!? i swear it was fine when posted and i checked after too . strange! :biggrin

    anyway, wasn't me, erm...... was a friend of mine.....

    p.s, the edit button has gone on it! so i cant change it but if a grown up really wants to please do.
     
    Certifications: ECDL
    WIP: A+
  5. JonnyMX

    JonnyMX Petabyte Poster

    5,239
    211
    236
    Have you been reading my emails!
     
    Certifications: MCT, MCTS, i-Net+, CIW CI, Prince2, MSP, MCSD
  6. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

    7,796
    71
    224
    If I did that all the other posts wouldn't make sense.:biggrin
     
    Certifications: A+ | Network+ | Security+ | MCP (270,271,272,290,620) | MCDST | MCTS:Vista
    WIP: MCSA, 70-622,680,685
  7. moominboy

    moominboy Gigabyte Poster

    good thinking batman! :biggrin
     
    Certifications: ECDL
    WIP: A+

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