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Drunk !!

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by Ash73, Aug 3, 2007.

  1. Ash73

    Ash73 Bit Poster

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    Dave came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk, as he
    often did, and crept into bed beside his wife who was already a sleep. He
    gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep. When he awoke he found a
    strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white
    Robe.

    "Who the hell are you?" demanded Dave, "and what are you doing in my
    bedroom?" The mysterious man answered "This isn't your bedroom and I'm St
    Peter."

    Dave was stunned "You mean I'm dead!?!! That can't be, I have so much to
    live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family. . . you've got to send me
    back straight away." St Peter replied "Yes, you can be reincarnated but
    there is a catch. We can only send you back as a dog or a hen." Dave was
    devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to
    be sent back as a hen. A flash of light later he was covered in feathers and
    clucking around pecking the ground.

    "This ain't so bad" he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up
    inside him. The farmyard rooster strolled over and said "So you're the new
    hen, how are you enjoying your first day here?" "It's not so bad" replies
    Dave, "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode."
    "You're ovulating" explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid
    an egg before?" "Never!" replies Dave. "Well just relax and let it happen"

    So he did and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg pops out from
    under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions
    got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time. When
    he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he
    knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that ever happened
    to him . . . Ever!!! The joy kept coming and as he was just about to lay his
    third egg he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his
    wife shouting... "Dave, wake up you drunken barst****d, you've shi****t the
    bed.
     
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  2. Sparky
    Highly Decorated Member Award

    Sparky Zettabyte Poster Moderator

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    ewwww!! :biggrin
     
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  3. Arroryn
    Honorary Member

    Arroryn we're all dooooooomed

    4,009
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    At best... that's a mildly worrying joke :)
     
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  4. Raffaz

    Raffaz Kebab Lover Gold Member

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    I like it lol, i must be a sicko :)
     
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  5. nXPLOSi

    nXPLOSi Terabyte Poster

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    Lol :D
     
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  6. malik06

    malik06 Nibble Poster

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    LOL
    Twisted! :D
     
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  7. Theprof

    Theprof Petabyte Poster Forum Leader

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    LOL thats something different.
     
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  8. ManicMonkey

    ManicMonkey Kilobyte Poster

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    only the sick and twisted could laugh at that.


    Prolly why i did .. out loud ><
     
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  9. Stevie

    Stevie Byte Poster

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    I like it, I'm telling it at work 2moro :D
     
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  10. Anand Prabhu S K

    Anand Prabhu S K New Member

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    Funny....i ll tell this to my friends....good joke...
    Lol
     
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  11. Fluid

    Fluid Byte Poster

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    ROFL Loved iT!
     

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