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#1
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Pull over, it's the Police.
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.' The driver says, 'Christ, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.' As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?' The wife smiles demurely and says, ! 'You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.' As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, 'F..k it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?' The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic 75 pound fine.' The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.' The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving.' And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, 'WHY DON'T You shut the f..k up??' The officer looks over at the woman and asks, 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?' 'Only when he's pissed.' |
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#2
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Ha ha.
Yes, it's a very seasonal jolly that one!
'To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer' |
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#3
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lol good one
S+,MCDST,N+,A+,HND Business Computing, GNVQ Level 3 IT, NVQ Level 1 & 2 IT Mobo: Asus Rampage Formula x48 CPU: Intel C2D E8400 @ 4GHz HSF: Tuniq Tower GPU: BFG GTX 260 OC2 Maxcore Edition RAM: 4GB Geil Black Dragon 1066Mhz CASE: Antec 1200 PSU: 700W Seasonic M12 DVDRW: LG 20x DVD Rewriter HD1: 250GB Samsung Spinpoint HD2: Samsung external backup drive 160GB Display: 22" Samsung SyncMaster 2253BW RIP UCM, your were always willing to help & will not be forgotten |
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