Problem with references

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Hello,

I been reading these forums and found them a great source of various IT related information. My question is quite unusual as probably not many of us got this problem. So let me explain the situation:

I got my first IT job in outside the UK as I'm not UK citizen, so I worked there for more than 2 years (first 2 years really were no problems with anything) and was sacked because continuing problems with the boss. I can't discuss it what exactly was, but I believe the we were both wrong which lead me sacked and I wasn't afraid of that, but on the day when I was sacked I didn't released how it important references are (especially here in UK), so when I apply for second job which was in UK it caused me a lot of stress and pain because previous employer just respond to referee "Unfortunately I can't provide reference for this person, please ask him why it is so", I couldn't say all the truth to my previous employer because they wouldn't believe me, so I made a story and I think they believed me.

Now when I joined the company I really thought that everything will be fine, at least first week I thought so. But unfortunately the problem was my college, he was just one of those person which is very hard to work with, no matter what you do or what you even say to him is wrong. I knew that this might happen because of cultural differences (he was an Indian....), but I never during my work period argued with him or say something to him or behind his back, all this cost me huge amount of stress and head pain but I still kept myself calm I never said anyone how bad the things are at my work. So after 3 months of probation I was asked to leave, now when I started to look for another job I've asked my previous boss of the past job what thinks about me and can I state to my future employers that I left because contract was only for the three months and he responded no, he can't say that. So the situation is quite weird, but this is just isn't fair that you did your best and you left with nothing, even worse - you probably wont get another job if you say all the truth to the person who wants to hear it. So I'm asking you, what can you suggest here? Maybe anyone of you were in such dramatic situation and can give some advices which I would greatly appreciate.

Please don't think that I'm person who is angry for the world, no, I think it was just bad luck for me.

Thank you

 

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What are you really doing that makes two bosses not want anything to do with you?

 

I can't fully disclose that, but I can mention some details. I remember I had conversation with my first boss about something, I can't remember about what exactly, I just remember that he was partially drunk and he said that if he want - he can sack me at any time without a reason, I replayed that it's ok for me, just give me the money for the current month and next 2 months (which is required by the law) and let finish this straight away, then he replayed that if he wants - he can sack me and give me nothing and I can't do anything because I'm just a small fish. I can't remember how everything end, but nothing bad happen at the end of that conversation. But from that moment I become suspicious of him. Then around few months later he started to annoy me with various tasks and things, kept blaming me for nothing so I suspect that he's trying to force me quit (in my country if you quit for your own reason - you get nothing from your employer), but I didn't do that (now I'm really sad for that). So as being nr1 person for IT in the company I've decided to make a backup of some company's data and keep it for myself, so if he decides to sack me and wont pay me the money I can use the data to get the money from him. So as I expected, that moment come and he stated that he is sacking me I said ok just give me my money, I don't want any courts or become your enemy - I just want what belongs to me (that happened through the internet), then he become silent for around 1 hour. I sent a call to him , he refused to answer, so I did some calls later, but nothing new happened. So I finally decided to use my last card and stated him that I have things which can lead whole company to .... He responded immediately was really impressed about what I just wrote him and started to threat me with courts. I said ok, if you want - lets go this way, but he knew that he can't go to court because of other things (please don't ask what are they, I'm really not allowed to disclose this). So after saying that I have something which belongs to company he decided to pay me every penny which belongs by the law. We ended contract on that day. Before leaving we shake hands and I asked him what he will do if someone will ask how I worked what kind of person I was. He was silent for about 10 sec and said that we wont disclose anything, I said okay and left. This is real story without bite of a lie.

The second story is much more simpler, because the person with which I used to work was one of those who has problems with their ego. As I mentioned earlier I never said, blamed him directly or behind his back. Not even to my boss, who sometimes asked me how the things going for me, I always lied, because I was on pretty good money and I didn't want to leave that job for the next few months. I remember that I had a conversation with him and my college about the work one week before I was asked to leave (the discussion was originated by me, because I couldn't handle the stress and headache anymore), so I was quite impressed about what my boss said to me, I though that Britons don't care about the problems which they can solve very quickly, especially if they related to immigrants, but during conversation he was on my side and we ended discussion without actual solution, my college was asked to be more patient to me and me - just ask if something is needed. 1 week later - I was asked to leave, he said that they could give me 1 week to work, but they don't want to - probably they were afraid that I might do something to infrastructure (I really had no intentions to do that), so they paid me for upcoming week, but I finished my contract with them when I had a meeting with my boss. So basically I think that my college didn't like me and he forced boss to ask me to leave. Now almost 4 months past and from my sources nobody still employed in my position which means that person must do everything alone - he can't have a right hand in his daily tasks.

 

So...in your first job you withheld company data and decided to blackmail the company!!??

You know....that’s a big no no. I think you need to re-read your post out load and try and understand why potential employers would be scared of you.

You got of lightly, your VERY lucky. Forget what’s happened and move on. Don’t sit and judge the past look at the present and see the future. No point trying to make good of a bad experience - no matter who was to blame...your not working for either employer now, forget them and forget trying to figure out who’s to blame.

...But please...NEVER EVER...try to; destroy, withhold, delete , cripple or damage IT infrastructure...trust me it is a VERY bad move.

How would you feel if your were a senior tech and a work colleague did that to you? What about the poor fella who after you left got your post and for reasons unbeknown to him the IT system is dead and he needs to fix it, like NOW! Please think about this.

I hope you do not take offence to what I have said...that is not my intention. I get the feeling you may have been misunderstood and maybe you were stressed / bullied but it is important in those times you do not make mistakes which can make you a look like trouble...even if that is not your intension.

Forget the past, draw a line under it and move on in a positive mood.