Once upon a time

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Jak was confronted with his own cd drive, tryinging to play an audio cd, but something was wrong, it wasn't working, something was missing somewhere ! but what he thought !, Jak searched and searched for an answer, and then he discovered that........

 

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there was no media player installed..........

 

DOH!!



But the internet was down so he couldnt download one.....hmm he thought what can I do, I'm sure I had one burnt to CD around here somewhere.

He started to search around the server room and eventually found a CD ROM, it didnt look like the CD ROM he'd burnt "what the hell" he said to himself "I'll take a look whats on it anyway".

He dropped it in the drive, wiggled the mouse the get rid of the screensaver and double clicked My Computer, then the CD ROM drive icon, it wasnt the CD he'd burnt it was.....

 

...his long lost "Hit List " of peeps who had seriously taken the pi$$ out of him after incidents of great stupidity in the past

Jak hastily burned a few more names onto it (for it was actually a CD-RW), and with his tail firmly between his ears, he left the indignity of the Server room, munching a rather large portion of humble pie.

Meanwhile, back at the monolith, Jak bumped into none other than ......

 

Kermit the Frog, who was currently working towards his MCSE !

Kermit said to Jak...........

 

amoko.................................

 

Nothing, actually, as being still in a foul mood after his recent humiliation, Jak smacked the little green-fabric, wide-mouthed, jumped-up IT wannabe right off the hand of Jim Henson's latest stand-in, storming off in deepening dismay.

"I'll show them It's Time to Get Things Started....", muttered Jak, but by now the cloud of gloom was beginning to part, so in an uncharacteristic moment of remorse, Jak turned round and ............

 

and said "i'll help you study for your MCSE Kermit, just as soon as i............................."

 

...regain some dignity and respect around CertForums. Those guys sure enjoyed that one " he replied , dusting down Kermy (a long-time hero), and straightening that oh-so-wide mouth for him.

"yah know, Kermy", said Jak, as they headed off into the distance together, "I've been thinking, and I've got this idea........................

 

....of how i can take over the world, the problem is i need to take control of the CertForums servers first !

now listen carefully Kermit, heres my initial plan.............

 

I'll give you a leg up and you can get into CertForums comms room. Then you disable the alarm, open the door then let me in. OK

1....2......3.........huuhhhh

 

DAMMIT, what comes after 3 ???? I thought these IT certs were meant to teach us everything ?!?!

Kermy, can you give me a leg up again, but this time use binary ?

 

"right ok !

0... uh... uh... uh

hang on, what comes next ?" mumbled kermit

jak said " ok, try hex instead !"

 

hang on, hang on...... look the doors open.

 

"3f8eeh - Ah, I'm up" cried Jak. "Hey, look, the doors open"

Jak and Kermy wandered inside with a feeling of growing intrepidation. This was not to prove unfounded, as there, yes, RIGHT THERE in the C.F comms room, was a meeting of the Average Day-to-Day Users Committee.

Aw, Jeez, Kermy - this is our worst nightmare...they haven't got a clue about even the simplest ..........

 

Beaver.............

 

<Oh, Lordy, I don't believe this one's come back from the dead !!!>

Yup, Jak, you're right - said Kermy - looks like they're even letting beavers into this place now !!! That explains the open door, he's gnawed his way in !

Just then, the Average Day-to-Day Users Committee took the opportunity to present their lates proposal for CertForums.

"We have decided .....................................

 

to install a fan into Jaks toilet"

Results will follow shotrly I am sure

 

"Well, I feel so much better, now that those results have followed, but DAMN how did all that mess get all over the walls like that ????"

And where did that beaver appear from, anyway ? Must remember to ask the Bishop's advice on this ........

Upon turning to leave "Jaks Toilet" ..(I don't remember them naming a pub after me around here ), Jak noticed ......

 

... his reflection in the mirror. "Damn" he thought, ..........