Headache

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by nugget, Jul 21, 2005.

  1. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

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    The doctor said, "Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad new is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your ********* to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the *********."

    Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for.

    He had no choice but to go under the knife.

    When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.

    As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person.

    He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

    He saw a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need... a new suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."

    The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see... size 44 long."

    Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?"

    "Been in the business 60 years!" the tailor said.

    Joe tried on the suit.. it fit perfectly.

    As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?"

    Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure."

    The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck."

    Joe was surprised, That's right, how did you know?"

    "Been in the business 60 years.

    Joe tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly.

    Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?"

    Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure."

    The salesman said, "Let's see... size 36."

    Joe laughed, "Ah ha! I got you, I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old."

    The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 would press your ********* up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."

    New suit - $400 New shirt - $36 New underwear - $6 Second Opinion - PRICELESS:blink
     
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  2. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

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    Sheer genius, Nugg ! :biggrin
     
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  3. Boycie
    Honorary Member

    Boycie Senior Beer Tester

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    What a belter! Keep 'um coming :D
     
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  4. tripwire45
    Honorary Member

    tripwire45 Zettabyte Poster

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    I'd probably shoot myself...but my doctor would go first. :blink

    :biggrin
     
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  5. AJ

    AJ 01000001 01100100 01101101 01101001 01101110 Administrator

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    Just gonna check my underware now :blink:blink:blink
     
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  6. tripwire45
    Honorary Member

    tripwire45 Zettabyte Poster

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    That was *so* much more than I ever wanted to know about you. :ohmy

    :biggrin
     
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  7. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

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    Are you trying to give yourself a headache AJ?
     
    Certifications: A+ | Network+ | Security+ | MCP (270,271,272,290,620) | MCDST | MCTS:Vista
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