Cover Letter Opinions Please

Discussion in 'Employment & Jobs' started by Ddan, Feb 17, 2012.

  1. Ddan

    Ddan Nibble Poster

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    Hi guys

    Can you give me your opinions on the content of these two paragraphs of my cover letter thanks guys.

    I have acquired over four years experience in customer service roles, during this period of time I have been able to utilize, and perfect my communication skills. During my previous job at Sainsbury’s I was able to converse with customers via the telephone which has enabled me to possess a professional telephone manner. My empathy, and patience were key components that enabled me to facilitate best possible results in all customer based forums.

    I am a confident, enthusiastic, and proactive individual who is able to work individually, and as part of a team. I am driven, and I yearn for excellent results in all endeavours. I have the ability to adapt myself to all situations and, the willingness to further develop my knowledge to excel in the position.
     
  2. Oro

    Oro Bit Poster

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    That bit sounds iffy. Maybe try re-wording it
     
    Certifications: Comptia A+
  3. Ddan

    Ddan Nibble Poster

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    thanks for the feedback mate.
     
  4. RichyV

    RichyV Megabyte Poster

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    Avoid the use of "...was able to..." and "...enabled..." within the same sentence.
    In this sentence "enabled" has the more powerful use, so keep this and try to use another term for the previous part.

    HTH
     
    Certifications: B.Sc.(Hons), MBCS. MCP (271,272), MCDST, MCTS (680), MCITP:EDST7, MCSA:WIN7, MCPS, MCNPS
    WIP: 70-686, then onto MCSE: Desktop Infrastructure via MCSA: Server 2012...
  5. WalterMinty

    WalterMinty Bit Poster

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    Hi mate, saw your post so thought i'd put my 2 pence worth in. I had a cover letter written for me by cvstudio so thought i'd give you a few snatches of mine:

    "I am writing to apply for the position of xxxxxxxxxxxxx you now have available and enclose my CV for your consideration. I believe I possess the skills, qualifications and vital experience necessary to make a very significant contribution to your organisation."

    "I have a passion for learning and I manage my own continual professional development to ensure that my technical skills are current and meet the needs of a rapidly evolving environment"

    "I now wish to utilise my skills and experience to progress my career and as such I am looking for a new and challenging position within a professional organisation such as yourselves"
     
    Certifications: CompTia A+
    WIP: 70-680

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