The next time you have had a bad day at work, think of this guy Rob.

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by nugget, Dec 2, 2004.

  1. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

    The next time you have had a bad day at work, think of this guy Rob.

    He is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana.

    He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

    Below is an E-mail he sent his sister. She then sent it to Laughline,

    which was sponsoring a "worse job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won. Here is how it went:

    Hi Sue.

    Here's another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I could share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I must first bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.

    This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.

    This $20,000 piece of shite sucks the water out of the sea and it heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is I take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started to itch. So of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.

    Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from

    My back, but the damage had been done. In agony, I realized what had happened.

    The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my wet suit.

    Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate.

    When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the Jellyfish into my ass. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.

    His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in water decompression stops totalling 35 minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry compression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.

    As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my ass as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't crap for 2 days because my asshole was swollen shut.

    So, the next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass.

    Your Loving Brother, Rob the Bottom-Dweller
    Certifications: A+ | Network+ | Security+ | MCP (270,271,272,290,620) | MCDST | MCTS:Vista
    WIP: MCSA, 70-622,680,685
  2. AJ

    AJ 01000001 01100100 01101101 01101001 01101110 Administrator

    ROTFLMAO :biggrin :biggrin :biggrin

    The King has truley kept his crown
    Certifications: MCSE, MCSA (messaging), ITIL Foundation v3
    WIP: Breathing in and out, but not out and in, that's just wrong
  3. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

    OMG - I'm scratching already, just at the thought :blink

    Beauty, Nugg :biggrin
    Certifications: MCP, A+, Network+
    WIP: Clarity
  4. SimonV
    Honorary Member

    SimonV Petabyte Poster Gold Member

    Brilliant, thanks Nugget.
    Certifications: MOS Master 2003, CompTIA A+, MCSA:M, MCSE
    WIP: Keeping CF Alive...
  5. Rosy
    Honorary Member

    Rosy Megabyte Poster

    :eek: Fantastic Nuggy!
    Certifications: MOS Master Instructor
  6. syntax_error

    syntax_error Bit Poster

    LMAO nice one nug
    Certifications: mcp server2k
    WIP: Network Infrastructure
  7. quackers

    quackers Nibble Poster

    Thats fantastic, sure does put your bad office day into perspective [​IMG]
    Certifications: Degree, A+

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.