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Louie and the Bibles

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by ffreeloader, Nov 17, 2007.

  1. ffreeloader

    ffreeloader Terabyte Poster

    A pastor concluded that his church was getting into serious
    financial troubles.

    While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several
    cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed.
    So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the
    congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door
    for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church.

    Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the
    task. The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as
    salesmen and were likely capable of selling some bibles. But he had
    serious doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had always
    kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment.

    Poor Louis stuttered badly. But, not wanting to discourage
    Louis the minister decided to let him try anyway.

    He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars
    stacked with bibles.

    He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their
    door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.

    Eager to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately asked
    Jack, 'Well, Jack, how did you make out selling bibles last week. Proudly
    handing the reverend an envelope, Jack replied, 'Using my sales prowess,
    I was able to sell 20 bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf of the

    'Fine job, Jack!' The minister said, vigorously shaking his hand.
    'You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you.'

    Turning to Paul, 'And Paul, how many bibles did you sell for
    the church last week?'

    Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied,'
    I am a professional salesman. I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the
    church and here's $280 I collected.'

    The minister responded, 'That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You
    are truly a professional salesman and the church is also indebted to you.'

    Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said, 'And
    Louie did you manage to sell any bibles last week?' Louie silently offered
    the minister a large envelope.

    The minister opened it and counted the contents. 'What is this?' the minister
    exclaimed. 'Louie, there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold
    320 bibles for the church, door to door, in just one week?'

    Louie just nodded. That's impossible!' both Jack and Paul said in unison.
    We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many
    bibles as we could'.

    'Yes, this does seem unlikely,' the minister agreed. 'I think you'd better
    explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie.'

    Louie shrugged. 'I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for
    sh-sh-sh-sure,' he stammered.

    Impatiently, Paul interrupted. 'For crying out loud, Louie,
    just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!'

    'A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was,' Louis replied ,
    'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy
    th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible f-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks
    o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me
    t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read it t- to y-y-you??'
    Certifications: MCSE, MCDBA, CCNA, A+
    WIP: LPIC 1
  2. greenbrucelee
    Highly Decorated Member Award

    greenbrucelee Zettabyte Poster

    So funny it made me log in at a weekend :D
    Certifications: A+, N+, MCDST, Security+, 70-270
    WIP: 70-620 or 70-680?
  3. Bluerinse
    Honorary Member

    Bluerinse Exabyte Poster

    That's a cracker Freddy :)
    Certifications: C&G Electronics - MCSA (W2K) MCSE (W2K)

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