Health Q & A Session

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by Tyler D, Feb 7, 2006.

  1. Tyler D

    Tyler D Gigabyte Poster

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    Q: I have heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life,
    Is this true??

    A: Your heart is only good for so many beats,and thats it....
    don't waste them on exercise.Everything wears out
    eventually.Speeding up your heart will not make you live
    longer.Thats like saying you can extend the life of your car
    if you drive it faster.
    Want to live longer? Take a nap.

    Q: Should i cut down on eating meat? and eat more fruit & veg?

    A: You must grasp logistical efficiences.What does a cow eat?
    Hay and corn. And what are these?Vegatables.So a steak is
    nothing more than an efficiant mechanism of delivering
    vegetables to your system.
    Need grain?Eat chicken.Beef is also a good source of field
    grass(Green leafy vegetable).And a pork chop can give you
    100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable
    product.

    Q: Should i reduce my intake of alcohol?

    A: No not at all.Wine is made from fruit.Brandy is distilled wine.
    That means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you
    get even more goodness that way.Beer is also made from
    grain.Bottoms up!!

    Q: How can i calculate my body/fat ratio?

    A: Well,if you have a body,and you have fat,then your ratio is
    one to one.If you have two bodies then its two to one,etc.

    Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a
    regular exercise program?

    A: Cant think of a single one,sorry.My philosophy is: No pain =
    good!!

    Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

    A: YOUR NOT LISTENING!!!........ foods are fried these days in
    vegetable oil.In fact they are permeated in it.How could
    getting more vegetables be bad for you?.

    Q: Will doing sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little
    soft around the middle?

    A: Definiatly not!! When you exercise,muscle gets bigger,you
    should only be doing them if you want a bigger stomach.

    Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

    A: Are you crazy?...HELLO.Cocoa Beans! Another vegetable!
    Its the best feel good food around.

    Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

    A: If swimming is good for your figure,explain Whales to me?

    Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?

    A:Hey! Round is a shape.


    Well i hope this has cleared up a few misconceptions you may of had about food and diets.
    And remember.

    "Life should not be a journey to the grave,with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body.
    But rarther to skid in sideways-Chardonnay in one hand-Chocolate in the other-body thoroughly used up,totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO,what a ride".
     
    Certifications: A+,70-270
    WIP: 70-290
  2. Bluerinse
    Honorary Member

    Bluerinse Exabyte Poster

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    Thanks Tyler, your post should be pinned to the top of the new Health, Fitness and Beer forum

    :twisted:
     
    Certifications: C&G Electronics - MCSA (W2K) MCSE (W2K)

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