David

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by nugget, Apr 7, 2004.

  1. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

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    A plane was about to crash and there were 5 people on board and only 4
    parachutes. The first person said. "I am Roy Keane, one of the best
    footballers in Ireland. I am worth a lot of money and my fans need me
    so I think I should be saved." The others agreed and gave him one of the
    parachutes and off he went.

    The second person said "I am Gerry Adams, a radical Irish politician
    who can really help my country and I think I should be saved." The
    others said."O.K." and gave him a parachute.

    The third person said "I am David Beckham, captain of the English
    National squad. I have a wife and two sons. Everyone knows I am a really
    nice guy and everyone thinks I am stupid, but I'm not, so I am taking a
    parachute." and off he went.

    There were two folk left, the Pope and a 10 year old schoolgirl. The
    Pope said, "child I am old and frail and have lived my life while you
    are young with everything before you. You take the parachute and I will
    stay with the aircraft and take my chance."

    "It's O.K." said the girl, "there are still two parachutes. David
    picked up my schoolbag." :eek:
     
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  2. mattwest

    mattwest Megabyte Poster

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    Good old David!

    --

    David Beckham was at a news conference and was asked a question by a news reporter.

    He answered "yes they are very good, i like they way they fit neatly in my pocket, are only 2 calories and give me minty fresh breath."

    The news reporter said:

    "David i said 'tactics' NOT tic tac's!"

    --

    :lol:
     
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  3. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

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    Nothing gets past him does it? :lol:
     
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  4. SimonV
    Honorary Member

    SimonV Petabyte Poster Gold Member

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    David Beckham is celebrating; "43 days, 43 days!" he shouts happilly. Posh asks him why hes celebrating.

    He answers "Well Honey, I've done this jigsaw in only 43 days."
    "And that's good?" asks Posh.
    "You bet Hon" says David."It says 3 to 6 years on the box."
     
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  5. mattwest

    mattwest Megabyte Poster

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    Gotta feel sorry for his kids....

    :)

    Boy are they going to getting the micky taken out of them when there older!
     
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  6. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

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    :lol: to all of the above :lolbang
     
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  7. Nelix
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    Nelix Gigabyte Poster

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    Victoria has admitted in the press that David and her have dificultys in the relationship..........










    one is her singing the other is Davids ability to string a sentance together
     
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  8. tripwire45
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    tripwire45 Zettabyte Poster

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    "Sentance"? Sentence? :eek: :wink:
     
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  9. Nelix
    Honorary Member

    Nelix Gigabyte Poster

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    I should have used the Spell checker, but last time i put it on the main PC it stopped the MS Word spell checker from working properly
     
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  10. tripwire45
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    tripwire45 Zettabyte Poster

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    Of course, you could always take a shot at using this. :wink: :)
     
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  11. mattwest

    mattwest Megabyte Poster

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  12. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

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    Ooooh, I'm sure that would hurt a lesser man, Trip :lol:
     
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  13. tripwire45
    Honorary Member

    tripwire45 Zettabyte Poster

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    Nelix is tough. He's only been found to be hiding, sobbing under his bed once or twice in the past week. Just saying. :lol:
     
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