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An Aussie Poem

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by Jakamoko, Oct 24, 2007.

  1. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

    The sun was hot already - it was only 8 o'clock
    The cocky took off in his Ute, to go and check his stock.
    He drove around the paddocks checking wethers, ewes and lambs,
    The float valves in the water troughs, the windmills on the dams.

    He stopped and turned a windmill on to fill a water tank
    And saw a ewe down in the dam, a few yards from the bank.
    "Typical bloody sheep," he thought, "they've got no common sense,
    "They won't go through a gateway but they'll jump a bloody fence."

    The ewe was stuck down in the mud, he knew without a doubt
    She'd stay there 'til she carked it if he didn't get her out.
    But when he reached the water's edge, the startled ewe broke free
    And in her haste to get away, began a swimming spree.

    He reckoned once her fleece was wet, the weight would drag her down
    If he didn't rescue her, the stupid sod would drown.
    Her style was unimpressive, her survival chances slim
    He saw no other option, he would have to take a swim.

    He peeled his shirt and singlet off, his trousers, boots and socks
    And as he couldn't stand wet clothes, he also shed his jocks.
    He jumped into the water and away that cocky swam
    He caught up with her somewhere near the middle of the dam

    The ewe was quite evasive, she kept giving him the slip
    He tried to grab her sodden fleece but couldn't get a grip.
    At last he got her to the bank and stopped to catch his breath
    She showed him little gratitude for saving her from death.

    She took off like a Bondi tram around the other side
    He swore next time he caught that ewe he'd hang her bloody hide.
    Then round and round the dam they ran, although he felt quite puffed
    He still thought he could run her down, she must be nearly stuffed.

    The local stock rep came along, to pay a call that day
    He knew this bloke was on his own, his wife had gone away
    He didn't really think he'd get fresh scones for morning tea
    But nor was he prepared for what he was about to see.

    He rubbed his eyes in disbelief at what came into view
    For running down the catchment came this frantic-looking ewe.
    And on her heels in hot pursuit and wearing not a stitch
    The farmer yelling wildly "Come back here, you lousy bitch!"

    The stock rep didn't hang around, he took off in his car
    The cocky's reputation has been damaged near and far
    So bear in mind the Work Safe rule when next you check your flocks
    Spot the hazard, assess the risk, and always wear your jocks!

    Certifications: MCP, A+, Network+
    WIP: Clarity
  2. greenbrucelee
    Highly Decorated Member Award

    greenbrucelee Zettabyte Poster

    LOL good one :D
    Certifications: A+, N+, MCDST, Security+, 70-270
    WIP: 70-620 or 70-680?
  3. Bluerinse
    Honorary Member

    Bluerinse Exabyte Poster

    Excellent poem thanks gav :biggrin
    Certifications: C&G Electronics - MCSA (W2K) MCSE (W2K)
  4. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

    You bloody ripper mate. Strewth.:D

    Certifications: A+ | Network+ | Security+ | MCP (270,271,272,290,620) | MCDST | MCTS:Vista
    WIP: MCSA, 70-622,680,685
  5. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

    LOL !! Thanks Guys !! :biggrin

    I do have to point out that it was our Kiwi friends that sent me that ... probably in sympathy :rolleyes::biggrin
    Certifications: MCP, A+, Network+
    WIP: Clarity
  6. AJ

    AJ 01000001 01100100 01101101 01101001 01101110 Administrator

    Brillaint LMAO
    Certifications: MCSE, MCSA (messaging), ITIL Foundation v3
    WIP: Breathing in and out, but not out and in, that's just wrong

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