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The next time you have had a bad day at work, think of this guy Rob.

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by nugget, Dec 2, 2004.

  1. nugget
    Honorary Member

    nugget Junior toady

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    The next time you have had a bad day at work, think of this guy Rob.

    He is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana.

    He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

    Below is an E-mail he sent his sister. She then sent it to Laughline,

    which was sponsoring a "worse job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won. Here is how it went:



    Hi Sue.

    Here's another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I could share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I must first bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.



    This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.

    This $20,000 piece of shite sucks the water out of the sea and it heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a damn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is I take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my ass started to itch. So of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse.

    Within a few seconds my ass started to burn. I pulled the hose out from

    My back, but the damage had been done. In agony, I realized what had happened.

    The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my wet suit.

    Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my ass was not as fortunate.



    When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the Jellyfish into my ass. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.

    His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in water decompression stops totalling 35 minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry compression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.



    As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my ass as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't crap for 2 days because my asshole was swollen shut.

    So, the next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ass.



    Your Loving Brother, Rob the Bottom-Dweller
     
    Certifications: A+ | Network+ | Security+ | MCP (270,271,272,290,620) | MCDST | MCTS:Vista
    WIP: MCSA, 70-622,680,685
  2. AJ

    AJ Administrator Administrator

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    ROTFLMAO :biggrin :biggrin :biggrin


    The King has truley kept his crown
     
    Certifications: MCSE, MCSA (messaging), ITIL Foundation v3
    WIP: Looking at doing ..................
  3. Jakamoko
    Honorary Member

    Jakamoko On the move again ...

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    OMG - I'm scratching already, just at the thought :blink


    Beauty, Nugg :biggrin
     
    Certifications: MCP, A+, Network+
    WIP: Clarity
  4. SimonV

    SimonV Petabyte Poster Administrator

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    Brilliant, thanks Nugget.
     
    Certifications: MOS Master 2003, CompTIA A+, MCSA:M, MCSE
    WIP: Keeping CF Alive...
  5. Rosy
    Honorary Member

    Rosy Megabyte Poster

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    :eek: Fantastic Nuggy!
     
    Certifications: MOS Master Instructor
  6. syntax_error

    syntax_error Bit Poster

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    LMAO nice one nug
     
    Certifications: mcp server2k
    WIP: Network Infrastructure
  7. quackers

    quackers Nibble Poster

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    Thats fantastic, sure does put your bad office day into perspective [​IMG]
     
    Certifications: Degree, A+
    WIP: CCNA, MCDST

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