The Guys' Rules

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[font=&quot]Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules![/font]



[font=&quot]They are all numbered "1" on purpose...[/font]

[font=&quot] 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.[/font]
[font=&quot] If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it[/font]
[font=&quot] down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving[/font]
[font=&quot] it down. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Sport. It's like the full moon or the[/font]
[font=&quot] changing of the tides. Let it be. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going[/font]
[font=&quot] to think of it that way. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Crying is backhanded blackmail. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:[/font]
[font=&quot] Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work![/font]
[font=&quot] Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to[/font]
[font=&quot] almost every question. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help[/font]
[font=&quot] solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your[/font]
[font=&quot] girlfriends are for. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.[/font]
[font=&quot] See a doctor. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an[/font]
[font=&quot] argument. In fact, all comments become null and void[/font]
[font=&quot] after 7 days. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways[/font]
[font=&quot] and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant[/font]
[font=&quot] the other one. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us[/font]
[font=&quot] how you want it done. Not both. If you already know[/font]
[font=&quot] best how to do it, just do it yourself. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to[/font]
[font=&quot] say during the adverts. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and[/font]
[font=&quot] neither do we. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default[/font]
[font=&quot] settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour.[/font]
[font=&quot] We have no idea what mauve is. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we[/font]
[font=&quot] will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying,[/font]
[font=&quot] but it is just not worth the hassle. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,[/font]
[font=&quot] expect an answer you don't want to hear. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything[/font]
[font=&quot] you wear is fine...Really. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. You have enough clothes. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. You have too many shoes. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] 1. I am in shape. Round is a shape. [/font]
[font=&quot] [/font]
[font=&quot] Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight but[/font]
[font=&quot] did you know men really don't mind that? It's like[/font]
[font=&quot] camping. [/font]

 

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Nice one as always, Nugg - just emailed that to my wife

 

top one Nug
have a beer on me

VB *toss*

 

Someone emailed that to Lou as a powerpoint file and when she sent it to me I couldnt stop laughing...I thought yes and about damn time too...

 

Let's just hope that takes it for what it is mate, I'd hate to be the cause of trouble.

Oh who am I kidding, you deserve whatever you get.

 

well you forget he is the ARMOUR-dillo...so he cant take it I am sure...

 

Well, I haven't heard back from her yet...is that good or bad ?

 

you know what they say...no news is good news...in the case of a woman...no news means wait till I get home...

 

unfortunatly his wife is likely to know every chink in the armor, and every weak spot

i dont hold much hope for our armoured friend

 

LOL - I will live to fight another day....just might be after a "short break"

 

I hope u'll continue to live even after the fight