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Quitting a job for no job! Forced hand :o(

Discussion in 'Employment & Jobs' started by millsie, Sep 30, 2013.

  1. millsie

    millsie Byte Poster

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    Unfortunately due to a pregnant missus I am going to have to quit my job in Networking after 2 years!

    I've got no choice but to move to her end of the country (Devon) in order to be there for her and to be with my only child from birth. Obviously this is really important to me to start a family but am finding it impossible to accept that I will have to chuck in a fairly well paid job which I enjoy and which has got me pretty far so far in my career.

    The reason I am most gutted is there is so few opportunities in that part of the country to continue my career without having to side step to general IT support or just generally not IT at all!

    In addition I have never had to quit a job without having one to go to and that scares the hell out of me! Obviously I will be seeking work once I land there but up to now I havent applied for much down there as there just isnt anything I want and also the IT jobs that are down there are so badly paid! (I currently live just outside London)

    Has anyone else had this experience of your hand being forced and had the worry of killing your career for family?

    Millsie
     
    Certifications: N+, CCNA, MCDST
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  2. dmarsh

    dmarsh Terabyte Poster

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    Why doesnt she move to london ? Whos going to pay the rent when you're both unemployed ?
     
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    Sparky likes this.
  3. Sparky
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    Sparky Zettabyte Poster Moderator

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    What he said - can't she move for now?
     
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  4. millsie

    millsie Byte Poster

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    She owns a house in Devon, no time to sell before baby due in December! Cannot live apart in 2 properties to expensive.

    See my issue?
     
    Certifications: N+, CCNA, MCDST
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  5. Sparky
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    Sparky Zettabyte Poster Moderator

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    Errr - did you not think this was going to be an issue when you found out she was pregnant mate? :)
     
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  6. millsie

    millsie Byte Poster

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    Yes of course, its probably too complicated to tell the whole story, Safe to say that i've run out of options but just wondered if anyone else has had this sort of scenario thats all.
     
    Certifications: N+, CCNA, MCDST
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  7. Arroryn
    Honorary Member

    Arroryn we're all dooooooomed

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    If she already owns her place, couldn't she rent it out? Then the mortgage would be covered, and you could stay put with your stable job. You're not going to help anyone if you go and live with her, an added bill and mouth to feed, with neither of you working. Especially if job opportunities are as rare as you say.
     
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  8. Sparky
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    Sparky Zettabyte Poster Moderator

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    No probs mate. Can only go off what happened to my bro – when his GF gave birth three weeks later he was relocated up to Aberdeen which is about a five hour drive from where he lives.

    So he rents during the week and drives back on the weekend. Not ideal but he has to be realistic about ££££. He should be moving back home shortly but that’s been 9 months working away.

    Why not keep the job going and apply for jobs in Devon? Once you get something move permanently?
     
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  9. Josiahb

    Josiahb Gigabyte Poster

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    Surely cost of living should drop in line with the drop in pay if you move? Particularly if your starting point is London! To be honest it sounds like the decision comes down to a simple choice, which is more important to you, career or family?
     
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  10. SimonD

    SimonD Terabyte Poster Moderator

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    +1 What Dawn said, rent her place and move her up to London, surely she understands that a change in circumstances for you could lead to more heartache and less money for the three of you?
     
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  11. Arroryn
    Honorary Member

    Arroryn we're all dooooooomed

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    psst everyone, he says he lives just outside London, not in London ;)

    If it's still West Sussex, he clearly lives in the *best* county in the country.
     
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  12. sendalot

    sendalot Nibble Poster

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    Hope somethings works out for ya
     
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  13. Juelz

    Juelz Gigabyte Poster

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    Well the options displayed above is what I'd suggest.. find away for her to move to you... jobs are valuable these days.. and think about it babies are expensive I have a 1 year old and he costs a load.. every minute his shoes are too small and needs new clothes etc.. work something out but whatever you do do not quit your job.. let us know how it goes, wish you all the best.
     
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  14. millsie

    millsie Byte Poster

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    Cheers all, will do. Im going to have a chat with the Mrs this weekend, theres no way I can convince her to move up we've only just moved her back. The main problem is that we cannot afford to rent her place out as she has to pay an extra £400 on top of her mortgage in order to let it, so with the fact she is not working theres no way we can do that. It is looking more likely that I will have to open up discussions with my employer and be honest with them about my situation, I am going to say that I love working there but can see no way around not moving back even if temporary, we have a network down there and I will try and offer my services in the field but also discuss possible ways I might be able to work from home for a while then come back to work in the office when I can. I know its a long shot but unless I talk to them about it i'll never know.

    Cheers for your comments
    Millsie
     
    Certifications: N+, CCNA, MCDST
    WIP: CCNP route 642-902
  15. Sparky
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    Sparky Zettabyte Poster Moderator

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    Its worth asking the question mate. If you say it is only for 6 months (just as an example) then they might go for it - major hassle trying to recruit decent staff these days so they might be willing to work something out.
     
    Last edited: Oct 2, 2013
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  16. Monkeychops

    Monkeychops Kilobyte Poster

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    Where abouts in Devon would you be based if moving down?

    Living there I can say it can be tricky finding jobs in some areas of IT, but they do exist down here. We're not that backward ;)

    My last few roles have always been based out of the area though, combination of working from home and working away.
     

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