New licencing laws in Scotland

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While I'm waiting to get my foot on the IT ladder, I'm working as a barman.
We've got some new licensing laws coming in on Tuesday (Sept 1st)

Here are some of the more ridiculous ones
1) I'm not allowed to ask "Same again?" I've only managed to come up with "Do you want me to fulfil your current beverage needs to your prior specification?" as an alternative. A bit of a mouthful so any help in shortening that is more than welcome.
2) If someone has already had one (count 'em, one!) drink I'm supposed to suggest a glass of water/soft drink as an alternative. Bear in mind I live in Scotland here, suggesting someone might not want alcohol is pretty much the same as insulting his mother or calling his heterosexuality into question.
3) Over 16s are allowed (soft drinks only natch), but they have to be a certain distance away from the fruit machine. Bear in mind that these same people can legally go into a betting shop. I think it's a £1000 PERSONAL fine for that one. And points on my Personal Licence. Yes, you have to have a licence to be a bar supervisor now, and 2 hours legal/H&S/bull**** training to pull pints.

Pretty rich considering the pay is barely above minimum wage.
And the fact that the best way to get tips when you don't have a cleavage* is to impress the customer with your memory skills and the old "Same again?" routine.



*Moobs don't count, so they tell me.

 

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Good grief.

If you suggested to me to have a glass of water, let me tell you this BOY!! i would be insulted... you tellin me im pithed? *burps*.

 

If there was a significant proportion of people like our Rab^ I could maybe see the point of some of these new laws.

Although I tried to take a humorous view of the situation there is a serious point here.
By definition anyone old enough to drink in a pub is old enough to vote. Now the people that we've voted in are telling us that we don't have the mental capabilities to know that a soft drink is always an option. But we do have the mental capabilities to vote in a bunch of expense-fiddling, power-hungry as*****s.
Maybe they have a point there actually, but this nanny state mentality is increasingly concerning me.
I think it was Churchill that said "Democracy is the worst form of government...except for all the others". I see what he meant now. It's not so much a case of the blind leading the blind, more the blind leading people who can see the bleedin' obvious.

 

It had to happen.

Smokers have taken a beasting over the last few years, and no it's the turn of the drinkers.
I'd like to say 'surely we should be allowed to decide for ourselves how we treat our bodies' - but judging from some of the things we've seen and heard, that's not always the case.

There are loads of stories in the news about how many hundreds of pubs are closing every week in the UK. The government tries to blame it on the recession, but hello - tax on booze keeps going up (I seem to remember reading that the government makes more on a pint than the pub that sold it or the brewer who made it), you can't smoke in them and now they are trying to stop people drinking in them. The fag vending machines and gambling machines have to be patrolled and you're not allowed to put bowls of peanuts out for health & safety reasons.

Pretty soon you'll have to have government officer on duty it the toilets to keep an eye on the jonny machine lest it be encouraging underage sex. And to make sure you lift the seat up before you have a wee.

 

I agree with the smoking ban, although on those cold, rainy, windy nights I curse it.

There are some sensible laws, like no "double up for a pound" on the nips, no "buy 2 glasses of wine and get the rest of the bottle free", no "happy hours". Those deals encourage people to drink more than they perhaps were going to simply because "it would be silly not to".
Funnily enough, that's that same mentality that is at the root of the problem, in my opinion.
I've observed a lot of city centres up and down the country and they mostly seem to follow the same pattern: Friday, 10 pm (for example) the pubs are fairly empty, most of the tables are taken but that's about it. The streets are quiet as well. One hour later and you can't get moved for drunk people.
Since pubs are closing left, right and centre they're obviously not spending the money in their local boozers then heading into town.
Cheap supermarket booze is the real problem. Should we have a few cheap drinks before we go out? Pubs are expensive. We could just go out later. It would be silly not to.

It seems to me that the supermarkets pocket the cash and the pubs cop the flak.

 

Tesco have are now changing their licensing terms, from September 1st no alcohol to be sold between midnight and 5am.

 

As far as I'm aware, round these parts no off-sales are allowed after 10 pm.

 

It looks like in some areas Tesco had their licensing hours extended.

 

After how many cans of tennants?