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For thoses that buy dog food

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by wagnerk, Apr 24, 2007.

  1. wagnerk
    Highly Decorated Member Award

    wagnerk aka kitkatninja Moderator

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    I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Winalot in Tesco and was standing in the queue at the till. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

    On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Winalot Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that it works is to load your trouser pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

    I have to mention here that practically everyone in the queue was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

    Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned.

    I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the road licking my balls and a car hit me.

    I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

    Stupid cow..........why else would I buy dog food??
     
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  2. simongrahamuk
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    simongrahamuk Hmmmmmmm?

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    Classic! :biggrin
     
  3. Stoney

    Stoney Megabyte Poster

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    Brilliant! :biggrin
     
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  4. Headache

    Headache Gigabyte Poster

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    Nice one mate.
     
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  5. Morne Louw

    Morne Louw Byte Poster

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  6. Raffaz

    Raffaz Kebab Lover Gold Member

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    I like it :clap
     
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  7. Bambino1506

    Bambino1506 Megabyte Poster

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    I LOL'd :hahaha
     
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  8. SimonV

    SimonV Petabyte Poster Administrator

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    Nice one ! :)
     
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  9. Tinus1959

    Tinus1959 Gigabyte Poster

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    Good story. But it could be she liked you and just wanted to start a conversation with you or you might have bought the food for the dog of a friend. Or she might have been drunk. Or just silly.
    The human mind is so complex, you'll never be able to find out why she asked you this.
    Some people just ask a silly question because they have nothing to say, but want to.
    Picture this: The phone rings. I pick and say Hello, this is Martien....
    The other side: Ah, you are at home....
     
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  10. JonnyMX

    JonnyMX Petabyte Poster

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    I love messing with people's heads.
    I'm lazy at the moment as I've got a 5 year old son, so the world is my lobster so to speak.

    Next time someone phones you to sell double glazing, don't get all defensive.

    Relax. Have fun with it.

    'What? *double* glazing? How does that work?'
    '*two* panes of glass in one window! Woa. Hang on, that doesn't make sense. You mean two windows?'
    'And we can do that nowadays? Awesome!'
    'Like a glass sandwich? Nasty! That could hurt...'

    Please have a go.
    Don't be nasty because these people are like you and me - trying to make a living. They like talking to people rather than being sworn at.

    See how far you can go before they bail or realise that you are taking the p1ss.
     
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  11. Mitzs
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    Mitzs Ducktape Goddess

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    She might have also heard about the animal food that has been killing thousands of animals. Is it not over there?

    http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/03/17/national/main2581329.shtml?source=mostpop_story

    Just a couple of days ago purnia dry dog food was added. Very sad.
     
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  12. Tinus1959

    Tinus1959 Gigabyte Poster

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  13. BosonMichael
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    BosonMichael Yottabyte Poster

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    ...that's not the point of the story. :biggrin

    It'd be like going to a car parts place and buying a car tire, and someone in line asking you if you have a car. Or if you went to a computer store and you bought a mouse, and someone in line asked you if that was for your computer. :p

    Classic!
     
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  14. Mitzs
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    Mitzs Ducktape Goddess

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    I got the point of the story Michael, but with the pet food situation going on it may have been nothing more then someone trying to start a conversation with a stranger to see if they were aware of the situation and just trying to be helpfull. I'm sorry but the part about her asking if he had been posion when he ate it just sticks out in my mind. In case you didn't hear about it there was a case of a lady eating some of that dog food and both her and her dog ended up posioned.
     
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  15. Mitzs
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    Mitzs Ducktape Goddess

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    Glad to hear that Tinus. Neither was ours. But they won't be getting any can dog food for a while anyway.
     
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  16. BosonMichael
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    BosonMichael Yottabyte Poster

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    I've got 4 cats and a dog... I've been watching the stories. :)

    In any case, I don't have anyone coming up to me in the store asking me if I have a cat when I sling up 8 bags of Purina Senior Cat Chow on the conveyor belt at the grocery store! :biggrin
     
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  17. Theprof

    Theprof Petabyte Poster Forum Leader

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    lol that was too funny
     
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  18. Tinus1959

    Tinus1959 Gigabyte Poster

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    What do you feed them then? BARF? (www.barfworld.com)
     
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