Caution... They Walk Among Us!

Discussion in 'Just for Laughs' started by Kitkatninja, Jan 18, 2009.

  1. Kitkatninja
    Highly Decorated Member Award 500 Likes Award

    Kitkatninja aka me, myself & I Moderator

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    Caution... They Walk Among Us! (a collection of oldies)

    Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: 'Free to good home. You want it, you take it.' For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: 'Fridge for sale $50.'
    The next day someone stole it!

    ***They walk amongst us!***

    *One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted....'Look at that dead bird!' Someone looked up at the sky and said...'where?'

    ***They walk among us!!***

    While looking at a house, my brother asked the estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the north?' When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, 'Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff.'

    ***They Walk Among Us!!***

    My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but 'didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving'.

    ***They Walk Among Us!!!!***

    My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped She keeps it in the trunk...

    ***They Walk Among Us!!!!!***

    My friends and I were on a Lager run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount....

    ***They Walk Among Us!!!!!!***

    I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, 'Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?' I had to explain that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned...

    ***They Walk Among Us!!!!!!! ***

    I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. 'Now,' she asked me, 'Has your plane arrived yet?'..

    ***They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!***

    While working at a pizza parlour I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. 'Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.

    ***Yep, They Walk Among Us, too.!!!!!!!!

    Sadly, not only do they walk among us, they also reproduce and vote!!!!

    -Ken
     
    Certifications: MSc, PGDip, PGCert, BSc, HNC, LCGI, MBCS CITP, MCP, MCSA, MCSE, MCE, A+, N+, S+, Server+
    WIP: MSc Cyber Security
  2. vgarg

    vgarg Nibble Poster

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    Brilliant

    But...
    Unless you mean you got 20 % off per case? :twisted:
     
    Certifications: ECDL;CIW;HNC Business Computing
    WIP: A+;MCDST;N+;Bsc Computing
  3. mattstevenson

    mattstevenson Byte Poster

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    Unless Mr Wagner deals in US Dollars and works in pizza parlours, I think it's safe to say that he didn't actually write these. :tongue
     
    Certifications: Triple A+. Network+, CCENT
    WIP: MCP, ICND2, Sec+
  4. nXPLOSi

    nXPLOSi Terabyte Poster

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    Lol, good stuff. :)
     
    Certifications: A+, Network+, Security+, MCSA 2003 (270, 290, 291), MCTS (640, 642), MCSA 2008
    WIP: MCSA 2012
  5. BosonMichael
    Honorary Member Highly Decorated Member Award 500 Likes Award

    BosonMichael Yottabyte Poster

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    ***They Walk Among Us!!*** :twisted:
     
    Certifications: CISSP, MCSE+I, MCSE: Security, MCSE: Messaging, MCDST, MCDBA, MCTS, OCP, CCNP, CCDP, CCNA Security, CCNA Voice, CNE, SCSA, Security+, Linux+, Server+, Network+, A+
    WIP: Just about everything!

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